In the latest in our “What yoga props mean to me” series yoga teacher Syanne Patterson takes to the floor
“What would it mean to approach even the hardest tasks with a spirit of ease?”
This is a question I bring up in a lot of classes and is a question posed by Octavia Raheem in her work, Gather. When I think about props, I think about my relationship with ease. To me, props are ultimately about support. They’re a tool to customise and adapt my practice, to complement my daily needs, whether those be needs of rest, creativity or resilience. They allow me to float along with the current of my practice. Without them, I’d probably still be getting bowled over in the rapids as I frantically try to reach the shore.
When I started practicing yoga, like many, I was very asana focussed. I was impressed by a thin, bendy and strong yoga teacher who was leading dynamic movement classes at my local gym. The fact that they were also a bodybuilder only added to my super human fantasy of what this practice could potentially imbue. I wanted to be strong like that, I wanted those muscles… those arms! This was a me in my teens, struggling with anxiety and a tumultuous self-esteem at best. I was dazzled by this person embodying traits, predominantly physical, which I thought I needed to feel better about myself. I admit, ego was definitely how I “got into” yoga but my practice didn’t truly begin till I began shedding attachments to these idealised versions of myself and of my practice. As Krishna reminds Arjuna in the Gita, “ Those who are motivated only by desire for the fruits of action are miserable, for they are constantly anxious about the results of what they do.”
Many years, practices, injuries and efforts of unlearning later. I’m only now arriving at a place where the invitation of ease is a cornerstone of a my practice. My shifts in perception of props would have paralleled this shift in intention.
“What outdated belief system does straining support?”
When I first started practicing I was never offered props and a few years later when the opportunity came, I didn’t know how to use them but more indignantly, I didn’t want to know.
I would think, “I don’t need a crutch/ I’m cheating if I use them/They’re for beginners and I should be better than that”. I would push, strain and endure injury for the sake of “perfection”.
All the stubborn thoughts I had, that anxious low-self esteem teen version of me, we’re still there, making sure I was working relentlessly to be seen as “good”. I cringe now looking at the harmful ableist, ageist, fatphobic, perfectionist and elitist views I believed at that time. I cringe yet also acknowledge that these views were also hindering me from inviting any sense of ease into my practice. In all these efforts of being seen as “good”, I was turning a blind eye to some very ugly subconscious and internalised biases. Things which I will never stop having to work on – not until we are all in a world free from these oppressive belief systems.
“I’m not looking for easy ways. I am inviting more ease into my work – more trust in my essence – the qualities that make me, me.”
To be clear, props are not a crutch/cheat/the easy way out. But even if they were, why is society so against making things easier for ourselves? I know that the grind, persistence and motivation have gotten me a fair distance in my life and my practice. I have definitely pushed beyond limits and my own expectations, often revealing new capacity for strength. However, I also know that this constant striving for more or “better” – it isn’t sustainable. It’s exhausting.
I can remember the first time taking a restorative yoga class. I had never used so many props in my life. Some of the attendees who were there early were already bundled in their own blanketed and bolstered cocoons. I timidly began to make my own nest. The teacher soon helped me get propped up in a supported balasana. A previous me, possibly sweating in a hot power class, would be the first one to smirk at that throw away cue, “if you need a break come to child’s pose,” Me? A break? Never.
However on this day, I was being held, quite literally, by two bolsters, blocks, foam pads, blankets, all lovingly folded or placed in every gap between my body and the floor, in one of the most physically easeful variations I have experienced of this shape. For the first time, I felt I was given permission to let go. I let go of physical effort. I didn’t need to hold anything or fight against gravity, I knew I was held. All I could do was just be.
This was where I started making connections between ease and non-attachment. As I surrendered to the shape, to the ease of being I was letting go of a persistent need to be anything more than myself in that space.
“Making friends with ease is a new relationship, and I can’t resist the possibility it holds after a lifetime of grinding.”
In the long history of yoga, props aren’t anything new, but I do find a unique joy in being able to embrace them in my practice today. For me, making friends with ease looks at lot like play. It’s a space to be vulnerable yet curious, it’s where I can explore my boundaries in a safe and supportive way. It’s not being too caught up on the outcome, on the how far I can go or who I might be. Rather, it’s staying present with the how I am being. When I play with props in a practice, it’s an opportunity to discover new possibility, to create new connections and to make this practice a little more me.
Unless otherwise mentioned, quotes are taken from Octavia F. Raheem (2020) Gather.
Syanne is a yoga teacher and model based in London. Teaching with the three themes of Ease, Play and Community Syanne offers classes, workshops and facilitating spaces that centre community care and collective wellbeing
Find out more on the link below or follow her on Instagram