Now the title of this post may seem like one of my how to…. but to be honest this is more of a post saying that there is no right or wrong way to meditate and giving a few ideas if you just can’t get your head around it. Over the last couple of years there have been numerous articles in newspapers, online guides and general chatter of meditation and mindfulness and the right and wrong ways to do it. As a yoga teacher I definitely feel meditation or mindfulness is an important part of our lives, but personally as a human being I find it very difficult and I am learning to have no shame in saying that. It’s hard to sit in stillness, particularly if you have an image of what the ‘perfect’ meditation practice should look like.
Envisioning candles, incense, sat in a perfect lotus position with our hands in a mudra? Or is that just me?
BUT meditation to me, I am learning, is really anytime you take to be quiet, listen to yourself and settle into your own space.
The idea of creating a meditation practice can be a scary one, it’s not an easy thing to do and there’s always a thousand and one other things that seem more important to do. I am no expert in this, I do not have a strong daily meditation practice but I do have a few things I try to do more often than not to settle my monkey mind and dive inwards which I would like to share with you.
What is meditation?
Meditate – v. 1. focus one’s mind for a period of time for spiritual purposes or as a method of relaxation. 2. (often meditate on/upon) think carefully about something. – The Oxford English Dictionary
This is the Oxford English Dictionary definition of meditate which as you can see has no prescribed way to meditate attached to it or an expected end product. It is just stating to focus the mind and contemplate. I think a lot of the ironic anxiety which is wrapped up in meditation comes from whether we are doing it right, whereas in essence as long as we are settling into a place of quiet contemplation we are meditating.
This doesn’t it is not difficult but it does mean it may be easier to achieve than we previously thought.
So why should we try to meditate?
Stress reduction is one of the main reasons anyone comes to try meditation. By relaxing the breathing and focusing the mind we can begin to reduce the levels of the stress hormone, cortisol, as well as enabling the sympathetic nervous system to switch off so we have less of our fight or flight response. This will bring more of a sense of calm over the body and the mind.
Helping to control anxiety is another key response to meditation. Similar to stress reduction by bringing focus and an element of slow living to our busy lives we can help to control the symptoms of anxiety disorders such as phobias, paranoid thoughts and job related anxiety. Although not a catch all cure for these types of disorder it has been shown that taking time out of the day to contemplate can have a positive effect on the nature of these attacks.
Turning our thoughts inwards can also help to create some self awareness. We rarely take the time to properly understand why we may be feeling a certain way or reacting to situations that way. By slowly making ourselves more aware of our surroundings and how we fit into them we can often cultivate more self awareness and in turn our understanding of our place in the world and how to solve the problems we may have.
Our modern day lives often mean we are slowly losing our attention span. By running from one place to the other constantly thinking at 1000 miles an hour, our brain finds it very difficult to focus on one thing, meaning we often have an over active monkey mind. By cultivating the stillness of meditation we can train the mind once again to process only one thought at a time. This is also very true of training the brain to remember a mantra or phrase during meditation to increase not only attention span but also memory, helping to fight normal age related memory loss.
And finally, should you want any more benefits, meditating, particularly near the end of the day, can also help to improve your sleep. By giving you time away from technology and any other stimulus to just process the thoughts and actions of the day the body begins to settle into its relax and repose state. Breathing will often naturally begin to slow and sleep should come more naturally.
How to build meditation into your life?
So we know meditation is good for us and we want to give it a go, but how? Very few of us will be able to start straight off by settling into a 10 minute, closed eye meditation every day and if you can I salute you because I still cannot. So how do we build elements of a meditation practice into our day to day?
Mindful Walking
I’ve written previously about my love of mindful walking and this is one of the main ways that I settle into my thoughts. Walking out in nature, with no music, no phone and by myself, just letting the noises around me settle my mind into stillness. It’s a great way of having space to think and the mechanical nature of putting one foot in front of the other is a perfect way of emptying the mind. It doesn’t need to be a gorgeous scenic walk in the country but maybe get off the tube or the bus a couple of stops early on the way into work or the way home and use that walk as a way to decompress. Just take in the surroundings and turn the thoughts inwards.
Focused meditation
Meditation does not need to be sat with the eyes closed. If you want to do a static meditation but just can’t manage to concentrate/stay awake with the eyes closed then try and bring your gaze to focus on a fixed point. Traditionally this has been done using a candle, so you gaze at the flickering of the flame, but it can also be done with a statue, crystal, painting or anything else you would like to focus on. After gazing for a while the item being gazed at ceases to matter as we hopefully bring the focus inwards and the item being gazed at is purely there without being noticed. This is just used a device to bring focus to the mind and stop it wandering.
Mantra Meditation
Another way of sitting in a meditation is to work with a mantra. This helps to clear the mind by giving you something mental to focus on. Similar to the focused meditation but rather than a physical item taking the minds space a mantra is repeated in the head. This mantra can be anything you want it to be but some of my personal favourites are ‘I am loving and I am loved’ and ‘I am enough’. By repeating these over and over again in the head they not only help to clear the mind but can also be gorgeous positive affirmations.
Meditation Apps
If like me you find being in charge of your own meditation one the hardest bits you can take the responsibility out of the action by passing the guidance to one of the myriad of meditation apps out there. Personally I use Calm which guides you through a 10 minute meditation every day, always ending with an affirmation of some sort but there are plenty of others. I’ve heard good things about Headspace too and if you use something similar comment below and let us all know!
Moving the body
Some weeks we just don’t have the time or inclination to properly sit down and meditate and this is completely and natural and ok. In this instance I always make sure that I have moved my body every day and made sure that I am doing this consciously. Whether this be in the gym, swimming pool or yoga class I try and tune right into my breath, swimming stroke or squats so that my mind is focused on those alone. This can be hard but super beneficial not only for your mind but also your workout. You’ll find yourself much more focused if your not wondering what to have for dinner, where the girl next to you got her leggings from or whether that email has been read yet.
Last but not least stand on one leg
Finally, and this may seem like a weird one. Try standing on one leg, while waiting for the bus, doing the washing up, at the photocopier, any point where you might be still for a minute or two. Anyone who has been to my classes will know I throw balance into every routine, not only for it’s strength purposes but because you have to clear the mind. It’s impossible to run through your mental to do list while standing on one leg, you will topple over. So give this super quick mindfulness practice a go and see how you feel after.
Know it’s ok to not be ‘ok’ at meditation
Whatever angle we come at meditation or methods we use to calm the mind and turn the thoughts inwards ultimately don’t matter. I have come to the conclusion in my own sporadic meditation and mindfulness practice that as long as I am taking sometime every week to get my thoughts in order then it must be doing some good. The methods I use change every single week but that’s ok. For a long time I put a lot of pressure on myself to sit quietly for 20 minutes a day but if anything this was making me more stressed because I was focusing on doing the meditating and not just being. Ultimately know it is ok to not be ok at meditation, just ensure there is some time built into your life to think and slow the brain.
This may be the most beautiful 30 minutes of quite stillness a day, maybe the 5 minute savasana at the end of your yoga practice, maybe your yoga practice itself or maybe a walk out of the office at lunchtime. It all counts and is all as beneficial as the other options. Just build some time into decompress, clear the monkey mind, remove the labels if that helps and just be.
How do you find quiet time, be mindful or meditate? I’d love to know